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State of the Scrumptious: Birth, Death and Rebirth(?)
It’s been a while since there’s been life here in the blog, but fear not, for we have come to rectify that! or so we hope. Springtime has come, now it’s April, a month dear to me and my co-bloggers because it’s the month our blog was [officially] born. The same goes for Totali, Owen, CCY and… oh wow that’s it?! I don’t know any more April blogging celebrants ;_;
Anyways, we figured we owe you guys some explanation for this long absence, especially on this Special Day (I’m pretending that it’s still the 17th). I myself am very curious about the sentiments of my co-bloggers–why they drifted from blogging, why they started out blogging (because they started out this blog, and I was the foreign specie that ruined their habitat), how Scrumptious was born, and ultimately, whether or not they have joined the ranks of people who turned their back 180° from blogging, never to come back. So without further ado, a word from the Scrumptious chefs:
What made you blog?
I love to write and I love anime. Anime blogging is the perfect marriage of these two things, but before I became a blogger, I was a reader. Reading about anime became a daily part of my life and the more I read, the more I convinced myself that, “Hey, I can do this. I have worthwhile things to say and it looks fun.” Thus, I jumped into the world of anime blogging and, consequently, the creation of Scrumptious.
Wanted to have an outlet for my thoughts about anime. Got so much stuff in my head and I just want to share it with people.
I already had a personal (non-anime) blog even before scrumptious and I’ve been running it for around ten years already (though it has moved from one host to another a few times). Blogging, for me, is a way to express my thoughts on different matters.
As for scrumptious, Seleria, who was an officemate of mine, invited me to create an anime blog. I’ve been into anime since high school and I thought it would be interesting. She also introduced me to usagijen, who’s also an officemate of sorts, and thus, there was Scrumptious.
The desire to fangirl and connect with fellow fangirls. Specifically, to fangirl over Kin-iro no Corda. Hence, this, back when it wasn’t merged with Scrumptious. I was so gaga over this otome game way back college, more so when the anime started airing, and I somehow wanted to make the most of that Kin-iro no Corda passion (read: fangirl freak). And make money while we’re at it, so the stuff I’ve been buying on amazon won’t go to waste!
But things changed; what started out to be a not-so-noble inspiration to blog propelled me to heights, introduced me to this Whole New World, reunited me with writing, and got me in touch with my artsy side (however little). Thanks to this I’ve come to like blogging / writing because it allows me to express my innermost thoughts, connect with people, and gain perspective on a lot of things, my life and this hobby.
What made you stop blogging?
After starting Scrumptious, a desire to reach a wider audience started to grow, hence the transfer to animeblogger. From there, my ambitions for the blog only grew bigger and bigger and what started as a hobby slowly turned into an obsession (I tend to do that to other things as well, call it a personality flaw). I fell into the constrictive trap of timely episodic blogging and burned myself out keeping up with airing schedules, raw and translated episode releases, news and updates, and a myriad of things that was not writing. Posting a single entry took me hours to finish because there were so many things to accomplish aside from content. I had to worry about screen captures, formatting, timeliness of my entries, and self-imposed deadlines. Even after posting an entry, I still had to think of how to peddle my posts.
The commercialization of blogging took away the fun of it. Blogging became a chore and nobody likes doing chores.
First, episodic blogging takes up too much time especially with work and life and all that. I still want to write but it’s either I’m too lazy after a full day of work or I just can’t seem to manage my time properly with all the stuff I want to do. Anime is just one of my hobbies, I got LOADS MOARR! 
Second, anime for me just went downhill after Code Geass. Since then, I’ve never really gone past 1-3 episodes and most of the newer titles just doesn’t bring any excitement whatsoever anymore. The barrage of harem and explicit fanservice (you know what I’m talking about) animes ain’t helping either.
I don’t see myself drifting away from my personal blogging but scrumptious is a different matter. Before, I never updated myself with the latest anime broadcasts but thanks to scrumptious, I started to follow the shows that come out every season. I tried to do episodic blogging. It was fun at first but it became too tedious. For one, I blog from the subs and sometimes, subs are slow. And when the subs do come out, I have to find the time to watch the episode and blog about it. Most of the time, my to-blog-episode queue would get quite long and I’d only be able to completely blog a series long after it is over. In some cases, I’d have to drop some shows. I am happy, however, for my coverage of Mononoke since the show was mostly ignored by other anime bloggers at the time of its broadcast. I think scrumptious was one of the few anime blogs that provided detailed synopsis and analysis for Mononoke. ^^
When Mouryou no Hako came out, I attempted to blog from the raws but the show proved too difficult for my Nihongo skills. In the end, I stopped blogging about it.
But I guess the biggest reason why I drifted away from anime blogging is that I haven’t been watching much anime lately. Been very busy at work (and that is even an understatement) and even when I do have some free time, my anime resources are limited. Also, the shows I decide to watch aren’t those from the current season. Most of them are old and I thought no one would be interested if I blog about them. Sometimes, I do have some posts in mind but I’d never get the time to write them.
Twitter. NOT 
Google Reader Shared Items is the more likely culprit because it made me narcissistic. Sometimes I’d find myself checking people’s Shared Items just to see whether someone shared my post. Oh the shame. But no, it’s not you GRSI, it’s me.
Seriously, the [self-inflicted] pressure, the obsession, as the case with Seleria. Obsessed with the hits, popularity (if there was, ever), the attention. Wow I never felt so alive! But you know, as with most problems with insecure people, I got lost, and woke up one day, confused, not knowing why exactly I’m here. And the lack of co-bloggers, the lack of Seleria–my Kamina–simply made it worse. I have been wanting to take a break from all things blogging to search for my voice, but the attachment was too strong, and I ended up stuck in a limbo. Thanks to my recent Japan trip (and my laziness), I was finally able to do that, giving me some time off to really think things through.
A lot of the habits I’ve acquired in the recent years came about because of blogging. They weren’t natural to me before this. Unlike Seleria and absolute0, reading blogs–anime-related or not–was not part of my lifestyle. So is following anime season after season. I kept myself updated with the latest animes, to see if there’s any series that piques my interest, or whether one of the mangas I’ve read or the games I played will get an anime adaptation, but that’s it. I followed manga and otome game releases more than I do anime. But blogging changed that; It shifted the course of my anime/manga/J-related habits, and I ended up too focused on anime & blogging, at the expense of others.
I got into blogging with the wrong mindset, and I got into it prematurely. I say this because I started blogging when I still haven’t found the voice that commands me to write, in the words of Rilke. But when exactly is the right time to blog? Should you get into writing even if you haven’t found your voice? While you’re in search for it? Or after you’ve found it?
This dilemma might seem foreign to other people, in the same way the plight of the insecure lost sheep is foreign to people who have been confident and secure throughout most of their life, or how the struggles of the normal person is foreign to a genius. But each and every people are different. For some people, blogging is a walk in the park, so naturally and smoothly ingrained in their lifestyle that they can just sit and come up with a post without much of a struggle. I envy these people, but just because it’s no walk in the park doesn’t mean we should quit either. Perhaps the reason why other people can write so easily is because they’ve already found their voice, and I’m still struggling. Perhaps struggle is necessary to get better in writing, or that I just need to continue searching for that voice.
In the end, I chose to distance myself from blogging, to see how far I can go without looking back, perhaps? Getting lost on purpose so I can find my way back. My life needs readjustments, more balance, with blogging still in the picture. And in order to do that, I needed to “reset”, to distance myself from the things I used to love, to fall in love with it again–fall in love with anime, with blogging, with the community, with reasons far more lucid, clear, and pure 
and I like how my interests are expanding as of late–getting into musicals, TV series (Big Bang Theory! Glee!), JDramas, and finally, books!–enriching my perspectives in the process
yes, I know, being succinct has never been my forte.
What would make you blog again?
My love for writing still remains and anime is still fun. Sometimes I just feel so compelled to articulate my thoughts and share how a certain show or episode has entertained or moved me, because in the end, isn’t that what anime blogging is? Wanting to share what you find enjoyable, so that others may have the chance of enjoying it as well.
(But as of the moment, she’s lazy and busy with real life, or so she says :P)
“a blog where we are not constrained by time, seasons; where we can write about any anime, manga, jdrama, and movie we want. we don’t even have to be connected to the ’sphere… just, write~” That right there is reason enough for me. I still keep up with the industry, just not the shows itself though. And if shows the likes of kimi kiss, boys be, H&C, code geass and shows similar to cooking master boy and skip-beat’s genre (what do you call that genre anyway?) would turn up then color me interested. hahahah
Well, I am sure lots of cash would be motivation enough for me to blog. Seriously, time and anime resources, I guess. And a fresh perspective too. If I blog again, I want to do something timeless, something that isn’t constrained by the latest shows of the season. I want to do some quiet blogging, one that doesn’t mind if the post gets read or not. Something like Iwa no Hana or Ha Neul Seom.
a change of perspective, definitely. And more confidence! Shoo my inner demons! I don’t want to be constrained by seasons (who wants to be?!), but it’s not something I can just ignore either. In the end, it’s up to me to find a way to balance things out–keeping up with the current season, remembering/discovering love for older series, blogging, translating on the side and reading more books. I have yet to find the blogging/writing style that suits me best, in terms of reflecting my personality and something my limited time can accomodate. Maintaining a certain focus in blogging would help, perhaps. Or I should just discover the ‘best time to blog’, brew post ideas in my mind, until they’re finally ready to hatch (complete with outline, or at least plans on how I want it to flow and end). Most of the time I write my drafts will only bits and pieces of ideas, and that’s probably why it still takes me hoursss to finish the post.
If I’m going to blog again, I want it to be purer and more innocent, not tainted by the “pressure to blog”, or the desire to pander to an audience (there’s nothing wrong with giving readers what they want, but that shouldn’t be the primary reason for blogging). Quiet blogging, as absolute0 says, “one that doesn’t mind if the post gets read or not”. I’d like that. Blog as though I’m talking to a friend, not to seek attention or validation, contented simply with being listened to. If we can sit and talk awhile, then it’s fine too~ *sips a cup of tea with her pinky raised*
I’m leaning towards the blogging style of bateszi-sempai, schneider, Iwa ni Hana, gaguri, ghostlightning, OGT, Martin, ETERNAL, 2DT, and sdshamshel (more like my “[How I] Wish List”) Whether or not I can actually come close to what they do is another story. The aforementioned bloggers seem to have that certain zen and zest balance in the way they consume and produce (blog posts, etc), a stable space with their own pace, with balance and stability that will keep them going strong in this game.
non tl;dr version: I’ll blog once I found my voice, gained the necessarily [rhetoric] skills to express that, and found that right balance. And of course this will only happen after I fall in love with anime (and manga!) and blogging again.
These are questions I’d also like to ask other people who seemed to have drifted away from blogging. Any chance that the “retirement” will turn into retry-ment?
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One thing I discovered is that no matter what happens, sometimes, it’s just not going to be fun. It’s not going to be fun to finish this draft you did a week ago. You’ve moved on and forgot what you wanted to say at the end of the post. You lost the energy that you began the post with… you have 900 words put in a post that needs an ending…
this is a real shitty feeling.
What’s worse, if you put this off now, something tells you you’re not going to touch the draft for another week. And guess what, when you do open the draft it’s not going to be easier. So sometimes, it’s just not fun at all.
But do you give up on the blog? Disappear for a while? Spam twitter? Comment on everyone’s shared items on google reader? Anything that gives a semblance of productivity (but it’s a lie and you know it).
Sometimes, it’s just not going to be fun. You just need to suck it up and finish the damn post. No matter how unsatisfying the thing ends up, no matter how stupid you think you sound. You just type, add your links, upload your images, then publish.
Then you wait…
for that first comment, that no matter what it says, brings me back to life every single time.
—
Before you know it, your archive has grown. You’ve made a few new friends. A few new names start dropping by. Maybe someone re-tweets your post announcement. Someone new shares the post on google reader. Someone stumbles upon it. Your blog grew just a little bit, and just maybe you did too. What once would stop you, as it does so many others, didn’t stop you this time.
Don’t stop now. Keep giving me interesting things to read. I’m just one reader, but maybe I count too?
I’ll blog once I found my voice, gained the necessarily [rhetoric] skills to express that, and found that right balance. And of course this will only happen after I fall in love with anime (and manga!) and blogging again.
boooo – *reads longer version*
Gaa~h! :< Seems each was killed by obligation. I understand that displacement Jen, being out of the normal environment, and I hope you didn’t feel like you needed to blog… should never feel that way gaiz.
Reading someone else’s post and leaving a decent comment is just as satisfying to me, as writing a decent post of my own…. that’s just my roots; so even before I blog, I tend to still read a lot (in Reader or wherever), comment where I feel it, and I often find other’s ideas something to work off of, in order to possibly extend them in my own direction.
The writing will come when you feel it.
Cheers.
I couldn’t quit even if I tried. Case in point: right now. I’m trying to go on hiatus but doing a terrible job of it. I’m having too many “that’s the cleverest thing you’ll ever say and nobody heard it” moments. I need to write these things down.
From the perspective of a “non-blogger”, just keeping up with the blogs, reading and commenting, is like a ton of work. Every time I glance at Google Reader and see 50 new items, I just want to walk away from my computer.
But I love the interaction, swapping thoughts and stories and seeing people pour so much energy and passion into writing about the silliest things that we care about.
I guess I’m just saying, yeah, clearly there’s tedious work and day-to-day struggles involved, but as long as your motivation is enjoyment and a desire to connect with other, and not out of this overbearing sense of obligation, then it’s worth it, very much.
I must admit, I’ve never felt comfortable with my own posts. I always have doubts. I procrastinate too much. I dote over paragraphs. So, you’re not alone. Blogging is stressful, but we need to keep testing ourselves, right? The best thing is writing about something that you don’t expect people to care about, but that still ends up with a response or two. The idea that someone would trust me enough to go out and try something totally random makes me go all warm and fuzzy inside, that’s why I blog, I think. So, I guess I agree with ghostlightning: persevere. People will say that blogging is supposed to be fun, but I’m not so sure that’s accurate, I think blogging just needs to be heart-felt. Forget about everything else, just follow your heart and write about the things you love.
Blogging is not always fun, especially if you want to craft each of your post with delicate care. But in the long run, you get a lot more satisfaction from reading over your ‘timeless posts’ (as absolute0 puts it ^_^b) than some knee-jerk reaction post published within several minutes, when a stranger drops by to comment how much he liked your take on this anime/thanks for recommending these anime, etc.
It’s wonderful to have your own voice, but I don’t think you necessarily have to find it before blogging. That is not to say that taking a break like you’re doing is fruitless, because I think it’s great. It seems like you’ve taken wider interests other than anime, like musicals, Jdramas, books, and that’s good because it can change the way you see, and feel a same anime product. Just don’t do all these things for the sake of anime blogging
<—ooo pretty emoticons…
So take a rest, come back when you are comfortable!
By the way, I lurked on GRSI for about a week. It bored the hell out of me. I have no idea how you can find it more appealing than blogging.
I love to write, but sometimes the gap between writing and having written is so huge that it saps out everything from me. In which case, I just keep at it.
If I can’t finish a draft at all, I would turn to writing a short post in one sitting, about a subject that which I found personally meaningful. My best posts have been written this way. <3
Why bother constraining yourself to shows premiering this season? Why not take the chance and blog about a show you enjoyed in the past and hasn’t received enough coverage? I’d certainly be interested in reading that.
For what it’s worth I’ve never found the rhetoric in these posts lacking. If anything the posts written as a stream of consciousness have made it exceptionally easy to identify and relate with the author. By the time you’re finished reading you get the feeling that you’ve shared an experience with the author. Bravo to that.
Looking forward to the eventual revival.
@ghostlightning: What’s worse(?) is if, after weeks or months of leaving your draft, the feelings you had when you were writing it have already changed through time. And I don’t meant the dwindling motivation to write the post, but rather a change of opinion or point of view. And then you’re left with no choice but to put it into the trash bin because the circumstances have changed, you’ve changed.
but yup, have to persist! and I won’t stop, won’t stop writing, won’t stop believing. What’s more likely is that I’d spend less time visiting other blogs, or freaking re-organize my RSS subscriptions so that I can prioritize which blogs I really want to follow @_@
and you’re not just a reader! you’re ghostlightning, and you are one of my Kaminas!!
@Ryan: I’m usually too lazy to read other people’s posts, except when I’m researching or seeking other people’s opinions on what I’m watching/watched or writing about, to enrich my perspective. and I hate how my rss subscriptions have grown, when it’s filled with both blogs I really find worth following, and other obligatory ones. Must restart and reorganize!
@Baka-Raptor: too GAR to quit? hehe. snooping on other people’s conversations on GRSI wasn’t fun for you eh? or did you not have many followees/followers?
@kadian1364: I want to interact with people, and I find exchanging ideas and opinions enjoyable, but even keeping up with blogs can cause burnout. The last thing I want to happen is for me to enjoy reading and interacting with people so much that it hinders me from creating D:
@bateszi: no words can express how grateful I am that you shared that. “Forget about everything else, just follow your heart and write about the things you love.” QFT.
During the time I was drifting, all I needed was to visit your blog and After-image to make me realize THIS is what I want to do! You’re one of my biggest inspirations, sempai!
@gaguri: I have the tendency of writing some of our ‘timeless’ posts over and over, but I fear that it will make me even more narcissistic haha. It feels great, to read these posts and realize how precious they are to you, how heartfelt it is… makes you shed a tear of joy, and feel proud (and humble at the same time)
Developing wider interests adds patches to the quilt of my life, which can only make it more colorful and richer (I hope) Just have to be careful not to spread myself too thin
Thank you!
@schneider: Take it easy ala ARIA, is the schneider way~ For some reason I imagine you as a character going tralala *merrily dancing along the fields*~
@Shiro, Long Tail’s: I have long wanted to do that, but gah blogging about the new season is addictive! thanks to this drifting phase, I think I’m already headed towards that direction (though I’ve started to spend less time keeping up with the ’sphere and interacting with other blogs in the process. Law of Equivalent Exchange?)
aaand I think people are getting the wrong idea about this post. This was written as a sign of THE revival soon to come (or is already happening)!
Thanks for all the support!!
Do your best and thanks for all that you’ve done so far. I’ll keep reading you.
@Fionajude: thanks so much! you don’t know how happy that made me
You’re lying again. Are you seriously trying to sell the idea that you’d blog if no one read your damn posts?
Nonetheless, glad to have you back. Carry on.
I want to be read (who wouldn’t?!), but I don’t want that to be my primary motivation. At one point I felt tempted to blog and disable comments in the post, just to keep my priorities and motivation in check.
In the end, it would depend on what writing I have in mind. If it’s the ‘between me and myself’ stream-of-consciousness kind, then I would be perfectly fine with it not having read/responded to. If, on the other hand, I’m trying to preach/pimp about the awesomeness of a series I have watched or read, then that’d be a different story. Though I’d still want to write in a way I would talk to a close friend, to keep things real.
Thanks for reading!
Just visited your site. Welcome back?
Anyway, I hope I’ll be able to read you once more. Good luck with life.